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cancer
cancer
You know it's a bad sign when it's the day you're supposed hear back, it's 5:45 pm, the phone rings and it's not a nurse, it's your surgeon.
Cancer on both sides so it's good we took the whole thing out. Only one lesion was on the surface, the rest were safely tucked within the thyroid tissue. We have an appointment on Friday and will schedule a meeting with a radiation oncologist who will oversee my radioactive iodine treatments. It will be probably about six weeks before the first treatment because right now I still have thyroid hormones inside and they have to be completely gone before we send radioactive iodine after any rogue thyroid cells. And in a very brief description of the feeling of getting the thyroid hormone to zero my doctor said, "you'll be pretty miserable."
I'm going to ask for clarification on that.
It's been just under a month since Dennis and I celebrated our one year anniversary. I cannot help but liken this situation to when someone buys a new car or washing machine... as soon as the warranty expires ::poof:: the thing falls apart and you're just out of luck. Sorry Honey. And I bet it's even worse when you're still making payments! I told him that he should have gotten the extended warranty.
Even though we knew that the thyroid could contain cancer and the cancer has already been removed I'm surprised by how it feels, relating oneself to having cancer. I think it's a very loaded word, perhaps because it runs in my family it carries a lot of weight with me-- but I think it carries a lot of weight with everyone-- cancer = bad, that's pretty clear.
Then I feel a little betrayed by my own body-- we're supposed to be on the same team-- seems you can't trust anyone, especially your own freaking body, how could she do this to me?
Then I realize that's not very productive and that I just need to process this a bit more and adjust. hmm... I'll be back a little later.
Cancer on both sides so it's good we took the whole thing out. Only one lesion was on the surface, the rest were safely tucked within the thyroid tissue. We have an appointment on Friday and will schedule a meeting with a radiation oncologist who will oversee my radioactive iodine treatments. It will be probably about six weeks before the first treatment because right now I still have thyroid hormones inside and they have to be completely gone before we send radioactive iodine after any rogue thyroid cells. And in a very brief description of the feeling of getting the thyroid hormone to zero my doctor said, "you'll be pretty miserable."
I'm going to ask for clarification on that.
It's been just under a month since Dennis and I celebrated our one year anniversary. I cannot help but liken this situation to when someone buys a new car or washing machine... as soon as the warranty expires ::poof:: the thing falls apart and you're just out of luck. Sorry Honey. And I bet it's even worse when you're still making payments! I told him that he should have gotten the extended warranty.
Even though we knew that the thyroid could contain cancer and the cancer has already been removed I'm surprised by how it feels, relating oneself to having cancer. I think it's a very loaded word, perhaps because it runs in my family it carries a lot of weight with me-- but I think it carries a lot of weight with everyone-- cancer = bad, that's pretty clear.
Then I feel a little betrayed by my own body-- we're supposed to be on the same team-- seems you can't trust anyone, especially your own freaking body, how could she do this to me?
Then I realize that's not very productive and that I just need to process this a bit more and adjust. hmm... I'll be back a little later.
1 comment:
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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